A few years older but none the wiser

Well its been a while.

Why do I find myself thinking how this relationship would go on?
Why do I have to try to silence my thoughts again?

I have always lived by the rule that if you don't like something about someone, always talk things out with the person first. So I did. But time after time, I don't see what has changed. So what do I do now? Bury it at the back of my mind again? Is there a limit to what I'll have to bury behind there? Will there be a stop to all the things I have to ignore you do or say?

I see it as a problem that u created. You made me not trust you. All I did was to look at your messages. So I feel that it is your responsibility to get my trust back. I did my part of telling you how I feel about him. But every time I do, you get frustrated. Why? And then nothing gets settled. No change. No difference. You still go out with him.

Am I not enough?
Am I not needed?
Did I have an expiration date when u wanted to be with me?
Am I not all you wanted me to be?
Did you regret?

You don't seem to know how much this is affecting me.
Oblivious to my feelings, you seem happy. You don't seem to know how I feel. How alone I feel.

Do I hide this at the back of my mind again? Suppress my emotions again? So much to hide under a smile. Will it ever get better?

Why are so many questions unanswered?