Friday, January 14, 2011

Dammit, I hate this feeling

Between the lines.

You can either see that roses has thorns, or that thorns have roses.
Its all about me? It never was. But theres no point explaining.
See, wishes never come true.



Solitary, you don't know the meaning of that word.
Pms-ing freak , haha

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

This world will never be what i expected


I wish it was different
I wish you would listen
I wish you would notice
I wish you wouldnt blame me so much
I wish you could understand
I wish you could see how much I lost
I wish I could tell you that I'm not the only one always at wrong
I wish I wasnt taken for granted
I wish you could see the things I did, and not what I didnt

Its just a wish, not like it will be granted. Cause I don't believe in fairy tales.
Would you rather be a beggar with no money, or be someone who has money, but all his friends avoid him as he never keeps to his word? There would be nothing left. Time, friends, dreams, aspiration or something to look forward to. Its just like an empty shell braving the weather.
Yeah, I know I used to say I go wherever the river takes me. But only the dead follows the currents.

What am I fighting for?
(and you would ask, " Are you even fighting?")

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Average Joe


Cant seem to do anything right.

I don't seem to be good in anything. Average Joe? I don't wanna be one. Tried from sports to arts. They were fun but 3 years later, I still can't find something I'm good at.
Maybe I just try to act smart sometimes. A little knowledgeable. Not just a goof monkeying around. But it doesn't really work. You can't hide the fact that I'm not really good at it. I'm not getting anywhere.

Stagnant waters. Its been 3-4 months? If I'm not wrong. No improvement anywhere. No enlightenment. No life. 2011 is a new year. I really don't wanna waste my time anymore.
Gotta find something I'm good at and go all the way.

For now, no such luck...

Saturday, January 1, 2011

2011

Hey 2010.
The good, the bad, the worst. Tried and learnt a few things. What can I say? You were awesome. Everytime I look back, all I can remember are the great times. Maybe a little embarrassing. Maybe thats the way it should be. Memories shouldnt hurt.

Speaking of pain....
I had a habit of putting my leg in front of anything I don't want to let roll down a slope. Lets say Theres a ball rolling down a slope. I'd put my leg in front of it so it stops rolling.
Makes sense right?

Well.... Not if its a go-kart that is rolling down the slope. My kart was stalled as it went up a slope. I stupidly went out to find a mechanic. Realised it was rolling down and placed my leg in front of it. Felt like someone breaking my bone SLOWLY. It wasnt like a hammer, cause it was slow but heavy.
Ouch.

Hi 2011.
Nice meeting you. Hope things will get better and that I get to pass everything I take! All the courses, the attachments and liscences. And of course, money please! I'll be good....

Sometimes I wish someone would record the best points of my life and show me at the end of every year. Wouldnt that be good?

Some love to hate and some love to lie

Friday, December 31, 2010

If anyone cared

To be understanding is more important than to be right.

Nice one VP.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Kappish?

I should get a medal for going through that.
And through every lesson.

Nope, I don't believe in santa.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

-Sealed-


Sometimes I just wish someone understands.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Say what you need to say.







"Send someone to love me,
I need to rest in arms
keep me safe from harm
in pouring rain

Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing, all I can

To be a better man"

Mind's cluttered with words.
Speech stunned by the exit of all the things needed to be said.
I know I have my reasons, I know I did try, and am still trying my best.
Say what you need to say

Hear me out? No. Not needed. No explanation or excuses necessary.
Cause it won't be heard. Cause it won't change anything.

But one thing's for sure, you have no idea.



"Go easy on my conscience
Cause its not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame"

Saturday, December 18, 2010

AX overrrr!!!!!!



Lack of sleep, kinda common nowadays.

Back from AX. Actually kinda disappointed that they're getting less torturous treatment than us. Though I think they're kinda suay with the worst luck of all. Rain, pain, faint. Haha kinda rhymes. But they do have initiative to do some things themselves. Can't compare though.

Damn shiok sleeping in hammock. Either that or cause I really lack of sleep. I hope its not the latter. Cool wind, kinda learnt sumthin about predicting the weather.

Gonna get rock shoes but there's $0 in my acc. Damn, money money money. Loosing it while my other half is gaining it lol.

Its not easy to be me

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Confusing world


utgbiunhjrbvf

Pardon the giberish. Thats what happens when you faceplant on your keyboard after realising your stupid mistake. Thought I had expedition today, found out it was next week. By then I was half way to sembawang already. And I was soooo looking forward to it =(

Today, other than learning that my nose covers 3x3 keys on the keyboard, I realise that the world is a confusing place to be in. Ever heard of the story of the Cow, Old Man and his Son?

They were on their way to the market and they met certain people who said certain things.
Man1 : The man is old, we should respect the elders and let him sit on the cow.
The old man sat on the cow and continue their journey.
Man2: The boy is so young, he gets tired easily, you should let him sit on the cow.
They complied and continue their journey.
Man3: You shouldnt sit on that poor animal! thats animal abuse!

See, different people have different views. And its so confusing! Everyone knows the saying "Ladies first", then no one disagrees when they hear that "Men should lead the way"
How do I solve the problem? Easy. What are we talking about again?

On a side note, everyone knows how to count their ten fingers, but I know 3 ways to count my fingers up to eleven =]

MST screwed?

Friday, December 3, 2010

Another Quiet night


Unconsciously we do that don't we?

Scroll up and play the song I heard. Actually by Michael Jackson. Realise his songs is always meaningful (maybe other than about Billy Jean). I guess no one can do what he does.
Well, maybe just his moonwalk.

Missing the sea again. Seriously I feel more free in a kayak than walking. Thats why I'm trying to learn doing flips and handstands. Kinda give you more variety to ways you can move.
On your legs,
On your hands,
On your butt,
On your elbows?

Le Parkour. An exciting sport to learn one day. Its the closest you can feel like flying without wings (other than jumping off a building. Oh wait, it is about jumping off buildings.)
ahh... one day...

maybe I'm just searching to be free...

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Singaporeans

Crazy people in singapore, never learn to move in the bus. Always cramming the front. Bus was jam packed like sardines.... only at the front. At the back I still have enough space to fart and no one would know who. People ~.~

Kinda funny that I'm only updating before MST's. Yes yes people, I can see that I got fans screaming for me in my Cbox ;P

A carefree life. I guess everybody wants that, but only a handful have it. You can count on it that they are from hawaii.

After exams, front flip training, here I come

Disappointments, they seem to come after you think everything's fine

Sunday, September 5, 2010



Love is like flying a kite. There are times when you need to learn how to release the string and pull back with the right pressure. When the kite-flyer pulls too hard, the string will become too taut and snap.

Why would the kite-flyer pull hard at the string?

Kite-flyer wants to possess the kite. The kite-flyer refuses to let go. The kite-flyer wanted the kite to be in his/her arms only.

But the kite belonged to the sky. The kite needs its own space, its own freedom. Yet, it feels safely close to the best friend – the kite flyer, safely tagged by the string to earth.

Only the kite flyer that understands the kite most can make the kite soar and display all the beautiful colors on it

-from anonymous


True aint it?
Been wanting to fly a kite for so long. Got the string but not the kite. I wanna get the big big ones haha.
That way when I fly it, everyone will see. Anybody wanna join me? At WCP one day...
The feeling of flying a kite, its just awesome. Just like throwing a boomerang =p

Time seems to be zooming past me like in an F1 race haha. Instead of hitching a ride, I feel like playing poker cards by the side. or maybe chinese chess hehe
Gotta study. who hasn't said that?
Expectations.


Sit back, enjoy~ =]

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Cute aint it?
Remember when you were a kid. The world was your playground. Jump around without worries. (maybe worry that ur diapers get heavy haha)
I remember I love to climb to the highest places I can find. Above the biggest rocks, or up the highest slide.
As you get older, you get bigger, and feel as if the world is getting smaller. You start getting stuck in cubes.
(cubicle, classroom, office, car, bus, etc.)
Feeling trapped in a small place aint a good feeling, especially for a tall guy like me.
So I find the vast ocean more comforting =]



I wanna go out, see the world. It makes me realise that, we are actually very tiny in the world. If one day a tornado sucks me up in the sky, how many people's life would change? Not much compared to the billions of people who don't even know me.
I don't mind falling off a cliff high in the mountains or drowned by a huge wave. If its what I like to do then it doesn't matter. Maybe its the adrenaline rush, but when everything is silent, it all seems serene.

3star course was sweet, learnt alot. Great people, brain felt like a sponge haha. Learnt some diving too. Coaching next I guess. Even if you're aiming for the stars, but landed on the moon, why not do some zero-G backflips or sumthin to celebrate the moment =]

A successful man is one who wakes up in the morning, goes to bed at night, and does what he likes in between.

Monday, August 23, 2010


Heya, thanks for dropping by =]
Guess I didnt update the blog as much as I want to
Life's been passing by me lately. I feel so busy. So screwed. So relieved. So nervous.
But then again, what have I done?

Nothing much really. Just pursuing my escape.

I hate following the crowd. Being normal. Doing the usual.
I wanna do things the unorthodox way.
I wanna see the flowers at our feet when people are looking towards the moon.
I wanna see the beauty of the world and not get stuck in the rat race.
Explains why I still balance on sidewalks.
All I need, is a friend.

3star's been great, to learn new things. The world is small indeed haha.
It seems like its the only thing that I never get tired of learning.
Getting coaching soon ;)

Been a while since I used my headphones to listen to music. Feels great hehe...



Whats that? I can't live my life that way?
Just watch me.

Monday, July 26, 2010






Is it that you are working - or even playing - too hard? Because it would seem that you are experiencing a great deal of pent-up emotion at this time which could possibly take effect and lead to irrational behaviour.

You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognise the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.

You honestly believe that your hopes and ideas are realistic, but there seems to be no one around to give you the necessary reassurance and encouragement.

Being a very proud individual, you tend to hold yourself aloof pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain and pleasure. This is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional individual, one that may make a hasty decision and perhaps regret it at leisure. It is time now to break the bond of detachment and be the 'you' that you would like to be - give vent to your emotions and enjoy yourself.

As of late, you have been experiencing untold stress and this is a result of continuous frustration. You haven't been taking care of all your physical needs and it's beginning to show. It would seem that you have a need to find someone to whom you can really relate - someone perhaps whose standards are as high as your own. You want to be different - to be individualistic - to stand out from the common herd. Your inherent control of your sensual instincts is restricting your ability to give yourself to open up freely but this being on your own, being lonely, often makes you feel the need to give up some of your strict standards to surrender to the general flow - to be like everyone else; a part of the herd. Deep down you regard such instincts as weaknesses to be overcome. You would like to be loved or admired for yourself alone. You demand recognition and tender loving care.

There is that inherent fear that you may be prevented from attaining the better things in life - those things that you consider essential to your well-being. So you are prepared to try everything to prove to yourself that whatever you do or try will go wrong. This destructive attitude could come under the heading of 'a self fulfilling prophesy'. This belittling yourself is your method of disguising how hopeless and what a waste of time you feel that everything is. So now turn it about. As you 'think', so you are... So 'imagine' yourself successful. 'Pretend', 'act it out' and you may be pleasantly surprised at the outcome.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maybe I'm just doing these quizes to know what I want


Monday, July 12, 2010




You are striving for a life full of activity and experience and, perhaps even more, an environment where you would be able to forge a close bond with a person who can offer full emotional fulfilment.

In the past there have been - and maybe there still are - many things that you have had to do without. You have now decided to set your sights on a position or situation that could give you greater prestige and which will afford you considerable self esteem.

You give the impression that you are a self-sufficient individual, pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain or pleasure. But this is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional person, one that may make hasty decisions and perhaps repent at leisure. It is time now perhaps to break the bond of detachment and become the real 'you' - the you that you would like to be.

It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.

The fear that you may not be able to fulfil or realise all of your ambitions makes you work and play hard. The thought of being prevented from achieving the things you want leads you to play your part with frantic fervour.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's always good to be a nice person, brings you further in life. (:

Anybody has the game "Plant VS Zombie"? I know you do, get online and send it to me!
I find it.... intriguing....

I've seen interesting/meaningful facebook status-es recently...

Never take anything in relationship for granted, don't assume what they've done for you is easy. They only did it because they love you. Learn to appreciate what your partner has done for you. If not, one will get tired easily. By then, you can't blame them when they feel like giving up.

most guys in the world are simpletons. and to those guys who agree, be glad that we are.


i still do get jealous most of the time. i just find an alternative way to get rid of that feeling.

Ok wait, these are all from guys.... hmm... lets find from girls...
if you could hear what i was actually saying or expressing, you'll be surprised at my vocabulary and expressions
Says to Edward "You have to admit, I AM hotter than you *raise eyebrows* "

haha!
Believe it or not, Gha has not played a sport for 2-3weeks? Wait, is swimming laps a sport? MAN I'm sooo deprived... Balls... I feel like a nerd lol. Going for PTN lunch later, I didnt know that 10bucks is per person. Isn't it like 3bucks per person? lol either way, I'm gonna have free pizza! woo!

Too many dramas been unfolding around lately. I hate dislike dramas. Its usually about 2 people who both think what they are doing is right. And mostly, (dun get me wrong here) it usually involves a girl.... true?

See, even Shakespeare said so! And he's the MOST dramatic! lol.
Seriously people should really listen to both sides of the story, and learn to give in a little. Girls, what guys do is normally because they are THINKING ABOUT YOU. No matter what it is, and no matter how bad it seems. We just think differently. Maybe too different... but thats what makes us guys right? haha.
My stomach is growling...
I wanna go Kinabalu again =/ Should have brought my own camera and got more pictures....


Damn awesome I tell you... My first LTC and the best in my life so far(Y) Even though it was freezing, hands numb, too little sleep, Acute Mountain Sickness (AMS) and whatever, its still the best. Its not how much that went wrong or was bad, but how much I learnt and experienced, and the people of course =]


Two goons.

Ebelybody



Moving on, another topic. Disasters.
oops class ended, another day then....
I wanna feel reckless,

wanna live it up just because

I wanna feel weightless,

Cause that would be enough

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

The Fear

Always there, always have been.

Sunday, June 13, 2010



Is it that you are working - or even playing - too hard? Because it would seem that you are experiencing a great deal of pent-up emotion at this time which could possibly take effect and lead to irrational behaviour.

And with a knife behind his back,
he walked on in the rain. Alone again.
-Triple Threat-


I need to go scuba diving and escape the world,
I need to play a serious game of basketball so that I can think of nothing else,
I need to go gym and carry weights till I'm senseless,
I need music to create my own world,
I need someone to believe me

I don't care, I'm getting headphones...

What hurts the most

Monday, June 7, 2010



You have always been on the move seeking affectionate, satisfying and harmonious relationships. Your ultimate goal has been the realisation of an intimate union in which there could be love, self-sacrifice and mutual trust. It has often been said that 'True love is just around the corner' and - if you haven't found it as yet - you possibly soon will.

You are very talented, imaginative and sensitive but you are holding back as you do not really like going it 'on your own'. In preference you would like to team up with someone, someone with similar attributes as your own, to explore - to seek out and go perhaps 'where no other man has trod before'. It is the unusual that attracts you and which will give you a sense of excitement and adventure.

The way things are at this time it is necessary to 'go slow'. All the pleasures that you have anticipated should be left in abeyance until some future date, but all is not lost, you are able to derive and achieve considerable gratification from someone quite close to you.

Your willpower and stamina are in danger of being overwhelmed by excessive stress. Your resilience and tenacity have become weakened. You are feeling overtaxed, worn out and getting nowhere: but you continue to stand your ground. You feel that this unfavourable situation is an encumbrance which you could well do without and you find yourself unable to make the necessary decisions at this particular moment in time to change anything.

The tensions and stresses that you have experienced of late have been the result of trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond your capabilities. You feel completely inadequate to cope with the situation and you would like nothing better to escape from it all and to be able to relax in a problem and pressure free environment where you can do your thing. However it is also something that you cannot bear to lose, and as such, are trying to give whatever you have left to change. It should be known that the changes you're experiencing are extreme and your effort is recognised by many.

-Colorgenics survey-

First day of MST, SPROG
The epic subject I forward module-ed for. It seems.... pass-able...
Went to the wrong class at first, went to T1851 instead of T1551. While everyone was getting seated, realised that my name wasnt in the attendance. Didn't realise that they weren't my classmates, hehh.... No wonder the students there seem to be talking about another subject....

Today is the last paper!! WOOO! BUT, im officially broke...
What a sucky way to start my holidays. Oh well, I still can have basketball, gym, swim whatever~

Went to meet Melvin Lee Yong Hui after so long. Been a while since we catch up. Went gym-ing, then swimming. Tiring work out day. But the amount we ate seem to cover it back up lol.

Still cant do anything right.